Down the Hidden Path Page 14

  Being there was worse than she’d imagined. She’d even dreamed he lay beside her, brushing his hand over her head, whispering in her ear. When she’d turned to nuzzle deeper into him, he was gone. She closed her eyes and tried to remove every fragment of Miah. Impossible. Utterly impossible.

  When a noise in the room across the hall grabbed her attention, she leapt up, out of the bed, grabbing her sweats on the way.

  She slung the door open to find Jeremiah standing just outside David’s door. She hid as best she could behind the door, peeking around it. “Nightmare,” she said. “He’s been having them since the accident.”

  Jeremiah raced into the room while Gray fought with her sweats. She pulled them on and flew into David’s room, where Miah was gently trying to wake him. When Miah saw her, he moved out of the way.

  She sat on the edge of the bed. “David?” Her hands cupped his shoulders and her heart ached. His face was twisted into a frown, his smooth brow furrowed and sweat matted strands of hair on his forehead.

  “No,” he said, voice rough with sleep and the obvious tension of the dream. “No. Don’t get in the car. Please. Don’t.” His hands reached out as if he could grab the ghosts haunting him.

  Gray’s heart broke because she knew this dream, knew what was happening inside the head of the twelve-year-old boy who was trying to deal with the loss of his parents. Her voice waxed stern this time. “David. Wake up, honey.”

  But he was still reaching for the unseen, and Gray thrust her hands into his while he mumbled, “Don’t go. Don’t.” And then he woke. Scared eyes darting around the room, landing on Gray. All of the fear and all of the pain of the whole world was summed up in that one troubled look, and Gray had seen it over and over again.

  “I had them this time.” His voice was small, broken.

  “I know, sweetie.” His flesh was clammy and his face pale in the slash of light coming from the hall. Gray wanted to scream. To stand up and just scream at the injustice of this whole thing.

  “I had them.” And in one great quake of his shoulders, the dam of tears burst forth. Gray dragged him up into her arms and rocked him as he cried.

  She was only vaguely aware of Miah slipping out of the room.

  Gray noticed the lights on downstairs in the kitchen and followed the fresh scent of hot cocoa. It had taken close to an hour to get David calmed enough to go back to sleep. She brushed the hair from her face as she entered the room. A single overhead light illuminated the space. “He’s been having them for days.”

  Miah tapped the spatula against the pan, but she figured it was more out of frustration than necessity. “I’m glad you were here.”

  “About that—” This was her opportunity to explain why David needed to be with her. For now, at least. Her heart quickened.

  His eyes were fire when they landed on her. “He’s not leaving.”

  Same stupid, pigheaded McKinley. “Then next time, you’re up to bat.”

  His gaze dropped to the swirling brown liquid. “I’m no stranger to nightmares.” Miah shrugged one of his wide shoulders. They were bare, his shirt off. A scar marred one pectoral muscle, and the remains of a summer tan created a barely visible line that cut his ample biceps into two equally large sections. Had he been shirtless earlier? She supposed, but hadn’t noticed. Now, it seemed the only thing in her vision and that irritated her.

  “How did you know? You’re clear down the hall.” She chose that as a topic for discussion rather than his reluctance to cover his half nakedness.

  “Heating vent runs from his room to mine. Besides, I wasn’t asleep.”

  “Really?” And what was he doing awake in the middle of the night?

  “An hour ago you were sawing logs like a lumberjack.” His golden eyes caught the light as he glanced up at her. Mischief and mystery danced there.

  Her heart did a little flop and she steadied a hand there to equalize it. “And you’d know this from experience due to all the lumberjacks you’ve slept with?”

  He chuckled, took a mug in one hand and poured cocoa into it with expertise that only came from years of practice. Right out of the pan and didn’t spill a drop.

  “I see you haven’t lost your touch,” Gray conceded.

  “I see you’ve kept you sense of humor intact, just well hidden under all that stuffiness.”

  “Hey!” She pointed at him, puffed her chest a little, and then quickly realized what an error that motion was as Miah’s gaze dropped to the front of her T-shirt. Gray caved her shoulders and took the offered mug from his hands. To keep from allowing him to see the heat crawling across her face, she cradled the mug and turned to the window.

  Miah stepped beside her and the scent that had invaded her night, her dreams, was right there, permeating the air between them. “I need you to stay on a few extra days. He needs you here.”

  Her heart lifted as if she’d won the lottery and become the queen all in one fell swoop. Outside, snow still fell silently; small flakes had clustered and were larger now, beautiful as they fluttered to the ground and collected at the lake’s edge. Already the evergreens were thickening with an icing of snow. She didn’t trust her voice to talk about David or her elation about staying on for a bit longer, so she turned to a safer subject. “It wasn’t supposed to accumulate.”

  Miah moved a little closer. “No. Two inches, no more, according to the weatherman and the news.”

  She glanced over, confused at the wryness of his tone. “Right.”

  He took a drink and made a face.

  “What? You don’t like your own cocoa?” But she had a suspicion he’d made it for her, the scent having threaded its way to the stairwell after she’d gotten David settled. She was useless to resist.

  “Guess not. I’m in the mood for root beer.” He stirred the chocolate concoction while staring into his cup. “Gray, what kind of kid watches the news every night?”

  She stared at him, dead-on, though with Miah towering over her, it wasn’t a nose-to-nose moment. “A kid like David.”

  “You know him so well, don’t you?”

  “Yeah.” Gray gripped the mug tighter. “I want you to get to know him, too, Miah. Just . . . just do it the right way.”

  His mug hit the counter and sloshed. “The right way? What’s right about any of this, Gray? We’ve got a twelve-year-old upstairs trying to rescue his dead parents.”

  She didn’t answer. How could she? Miah’s eyes were filled with the same confusion and pain she saw on a daily basis in David’s golden gaze. When she only shook her head, he said, “How’s that right?”

  The words bit, scalded, even, as she drew them in and tried to absorb them. On a long exhale, she said, “It’s not. I’m doing the best I can here.”

  And then his hand, warm from the mug moments ago, landed on her shoulder. “I know you are,” he whispered, and Gray could smell the cocoa on his breath. “But I’m not the enemy.”

  She squared her shoulders and pulled away. “Anyone who tries to take him from me is the enemy, Jeremiah.” Though she hated to admit it, even Bill and Angela had become the enemy. How could they have chosen Miah as David’s guardian instead of her? She’d gone over and over it in her head. To them, money was important. Having the finances to give David everything he could ever want, but what about love? She’d loved him since the day he was born. How could they just snatch him away? Then again, Wilson had explained more than once that the Olsons really believed they were doing the right thing. David would want for nothing, and she’d maintain the same relationship with him she’d always had. But they couldn’t have known that she’d wanted more. That seeing her son grow each and every day was wonderful, but also left a hole in her heart. They’d betrayed her. There was no one she could trust. “I don’t want any more cocoa.” She placed the cup in the sink and walked out of the kitchen.

  Miah stayed in the kitche
n for a time, just listening to the silence of a house asleep. Gray had long since gone back to bed when Caleb entered and started digging things out to make a sandwich. He didn’t bother to speak to Miah. “You’re hungry? It’s the middle of the night.”

  “My appetite is at its peak these days.”

  Miah patted his shoulder as he walked past to get a can of pop out of the fridge. He opened the door and searched. “Are we out of root beer?”

  “Yep.” The sound of a pop-top sliced the air and Miah’s mouth watered. Behind him, he heard Caleb guzzling the drink. “Oh, sorry. I took the last one.”

  Miah shut the refrigerator door. “You got something to say, little brother, just say it.”

  Caleb smirked, his blue eyes shooting sparks. “At least you gave her your room.”

  Miah knew what this was about, but it wasn’t Caleb’s business and he needed to establish that. At the same time, Gray had warned him about the way he handled Caleb. Geez. Why did this have to be so hard? He scrubbed at the day-old scruff on his jaw. “I just can’t . . .” Miah shook his head and pointed at the door as if Gray were standing just beyond it. “How could she come here day after day and look me in the eye knowing, knowing she’d lied to me all this time?”

  Caleb looked less than interested.

  But if Miah could make him understand, make him see, this would be one less disaster he’d have to deal with. “She spent her days here, Caleb, then went home to him. How does someone do that?”

  Caleb sniffed. “Don’t know. I’ve never been a scared, alone, eighteen-year-old pregnant girl.”

  “The sarcasm really helps, Caleb.”

  He took a bite of his sandwich. “How’s the drama helping?”

  Miah curled his hands into fists. No one got under his skin like his little brother. “You call this drama?”

  “She did what she thought she had to do. It’s not like you were there for her.” Caleb’s open hands rested on the counter.

  “You were a kid. You don’t know anything about it.”

  At that, Caleb threw the half-empty can of pop at the trash. He spun to face Miah. “Really? I know what it did to Dad when he realized you were gone.”

  Fire shot from Caleb’s eyes and Miah knew he’d gone too far.

  “You ran off. Just like that. Supposed to be getting ready for basic, and bam! You’re gone. It was three days before we knew you were in LA. Dad went through hell in that time and I was right there with him. So, don’t tell me I don’t know anything about it. It hadn’t even been a year since we’d lost Mom.”

  Miah swallowed. The fury in his brother’s voice, the pain he must have felt, stole a little of the anger from Miah. He opened his mouth, but didn’t have words. “Gray left first. She was gone the day after—”

  “The day after you what, Miah? The day after she gave herself to you?”

  He was trying to sort it, but it was a long time ago. “She left that next day.” And honestly, he’d felt relieved she was going to be gone for a while.

  Caleb ran a hand over his right arm. Miah knew he did this because it sometimes felt numb.

  “I asked her about it,” Caleb said. “She told me you knew she was leaving for a week. Counseling at that camp in Laver. You slept with her, but you couldn’t wait for her to get back before running away with Cransden?”

  “I shouldn’t have. It was really stupid. I should have been there when she got home. But what happened between Gray and me spooked me. I was a kid.” It didn’t excuse his actions. Nothing did. He’d hurt his best friend so badly she had never wanted to see him again.

  “She was a kid, too, Miah.”

  Caleb was right. Still, this was between Gray and him and Caleb needed to keep a distance from it. Whether Miah’s actions were right or wrong, nothing excused twelve years of secrecy. “You don’t have to tell me I messed up, okay? I get it. I didn’t do everything right.”

  “No, bro.” Caleb tossed the rest of his sandwich in the trash. “You didn’t do anything right.”

  CHAPTER 9

  A ray of sun split the room into two parts as Gray squinted against the glare. It was morning. She stretched, tried to muster, but the bed was warm, the air was chilly, and she was in Miah’s private space.

  Reality settled over her like a frozen slushie and she slithered out and made her way to the master bath. Inside was a claw-foot tub that beckoned her, but she ignored it. She needed to check on David.

  She found them all downstairs in the kitchen. Miah stood over the stove, David at the sink, and Caleb was sitting at the counter on a barstool. They all looked up when she came in. She grunted and David giggled. “She’s not a morning person.”

  Caleb leaned forward. “You’re always perky and chipper when you arrive in the mornings. What happened?”

  David laughed. “That’s after coffee. Before coffee, she’s a bear. And not like a little panda bear; like a grizzly, all showing her teeth and growling. It’s scary.” He looked good. Seemed well, even a bit of color to his cheeks and a smile still firmly planted on his face.

  She gave him a mock glare. But this was good. He was feeling more comfortable in his surroundings. Oh. This was bad.

  “Do I mix the batter like this, Jeremiah?” Innocent golden eyes searched out his father’s face, and Gray’s heart sputtered in her chest. It was such a normal and average thing for a son to ask his father, yet Miah really had been denied little inquisitions like this one. For twelve years. Because of her.

  Miah had on a sweatshirt and jeans. He looked fine. He leaned over from the stove and stared into the bowl of batter David stirred at the sink. “Great. Skillet’s ready; you want to drop them on?”

  Gray took a seat beside Caleb and stretched to look in the bowl. Oh. Pancake batter. Miah poured a cup of coffee and shoved it across the counter to her.

  David shrugged. “Sure. Gray burns the pancakes. Always leaves them in the pan too long. They get black on one side.”

  She dropped her head to the butcher block. Nothing was sacred. She tilted slightly and peered at David. “You don’t have to tell everything, you know.”

  David grinned at her and moved to the electric skillet beside the stove. She hadn’t seen him smiling for days. Maybe this was all going to be okay.

  Miah moved closer to him as David hovered over the cooktop. “Stick your finger in the batter and let one drop land on the skillet.”

  David shrugged and did as instructed. When his hand got a little too close, Miah took hold of it and raised it a few inches higher. The tiny ball of batter sizzled, danced, and cooked quickly. Miah used the corner of the spatula to lift it and drop it in the sink. “That’s how you know it’s ready.”

  The batter bowl had a pour spout, so David tilted it above the skillet and watched as the pancake began to form. “Just one at a time?” David asked.

  “You can fit another on there.”

  “Will I have room to flip them?”

  “Yep.”

  He poured another as the first continued to sizzle.

  Miah pointed. “When it fills with bubbles that means it’s ready. Pancakes should only be turned over once or they get tough.”

  David’s gaze snagged on Gray. “Hey, maybe that’s what’s wrong with yours.”

  Again, she gave him a warning look, but had to admit, it was great to see him teasing. Even if she was the butt of the joke.

  As David kept a close watch on the sizzling pancakes, he launched into a story. “One time, Gray thought she’d put a cookie in the microwave for twenty seconds, but she hit twenty minutes and walked out of the kitchen.”

  Miah’s eyes grew wide as he split his glances between David and Gray. “What happened?”

  “She found it after a couple minutes. Said she smelled something burning.”

  Miah laughed. “I bet she did.” His shirt stretched across his taut c
hest muscles and Gray willed herself to look away. She should be happy. David was talking, joking, almost seemed like a normal boy again. But seeing Miah and David navigating life and pancakes and their newly found relationship just made her feel further away.

  David’s honey eyes were filled with sparks of gold and mischief. “Tell them what you told me, Gray.”

  She sighed, resolved to her morning of torture. “The cookie was on fire.”

  Miah’s brows rose. “What?”

  She nodded. “Yeah. Who knew? Right there in the middle of the microwave, flames. The neighbors called the fire department. It was quite a spectacle.”

  “I love that story,” David said. He used the spatula to point at the pancake. “Is it ready?”

  “You tell me.”

  He nodded and slid the spatula under the pancake. Miah stepped behind him and cupped his hand around David’s. “All in the wrist. We’re gonna slide it over, then flip it right into the same spot. Go.”

  David did, and when the pancake dropped onto the skillet, it was a perfect circle with just a bit of splatter around the edge.

  “Good job.” Miah went back to his scrambled eggs and left David cooking pancakes.

  When breakfast was finished, and Gray’s stomach full, she leaned back in the wooden chair at the farm table, the big country kitchen and all its wonderful smells surrounding her. “Great pancakes, David.”